Julkalender

They hurt. It was like they were going to explode. It was like in the beginning, when I had first lost my hearing and speaking. I told Bert the other morning and he thought we should go to the hospital. I didn't want at first. It was just so.. stupid and annoying. What could they possible tell me that would be bad new? More bad than being deaf and dumb? No, not likely. So I stayed at his apartment, with aspirin for the pain and secretly trying to make that sound again. But nothing happened. My throat hurt a bit. Maybe it was because I was trying to make sound when I couldn't. Or maybe something had started. That was Bert's theory. That somehow my hearing and speaking was coming back. I wanted to believe him, but all these lonely, empty years had convinced me not to believe in fairytales. I couldn't get my hopes up. It would crush me. I still believed that it was my sight's turn to go. I would become a freak for real.

A sudden attack of pain made me put my arms over my ears, and a few tears fell down my cheek. I put the quilt around me, trying to keep warm. Every time Bert was away from me, it was just so cold. Well, he was just in the kitchen, talking to someone in the phone, doing important business, but still. He was far away. I missed him. I hugged the pillow, pretending it was him. Then the pain struck again. I tried to scream, but nothing. Just tears and pain.

Somewhere between the pain and tears and taking another aspirin I must have fallen asleep. At least I woke up, feeling a lot better. Well it didn't hurt as much, but it was sore, and as I touched my ears it hurt. I didn't do that again

“...ut I'm worried..”

I sat up straight. What was that?I looked around. I could have sworn that someone was speaking. I looked around. I was alone.

“She doesn't want to go...”

There it was again. Suddenly I realized that it was Bert, talking. He was talking in his phone. And I had heard him. I started screaming. Not a sound. I hit the wall really hard several times. I could hear it. Footsteps. I could hear them too.

He ran into the room. I took the notepad and wrote it down.

“You can hear me?” he said. I nodded.

“Oh, my god,” he said and hugged me. I wanted to scream, cause it hurt as he touched my ears but I was too happy.

“That means...” he said but the pain interrupted him, since I fell down on the bed, clutching to my ears. The sound was gone. I looked at him, and he was opening his mouth but not a sound came out. Only pain. I couldn't even read his lips, cause my tears were running down my face.

I shook my head, wiping away the tears.

“We have to go to the hospital,” he said and hugged my hand. I nodded.