Julkalender

He held me in his arms long and I could only embrace him back. Two days had been torture without him. I had seen my dad scream as he found out the alcohol in the house was gone and he had hit my mother, before I locked her in my room. After pounding on the doors he had left, probably for the shops, to buy more. That's were I had told my mother that I had begun to hear again. She wouldn't believe me and had said that it was only my imagination. Had she really given up hope?I had only Bert now. He was the only one who believed me.

“I missed you,” I told him and kissed him. He kissed me back and carried me to the car. I giggled in his arms, and he stopped dead. What was it?

“Did you just giggle?” he asked. He put me down on the ground and I nodded. “Oh, this is great,” he said and smiled.

We decided that I would go with him to their studio, since they wanted to record a song. He said that it would be very noisy and perhaps, I could hear something.

But in the beginning I heard nothing. Just emptiness, and I felt disappointed. But I watched him, and I read his lips and I enjoyed the song since it had great lyrics. Sometimes he sang so fast that it was hard to read, but other times there were soft and slow songs that moved me and made me shiver.

 

“Do you hear anything?” he asked me, with hopeful eyes. I shook my head and he sighed.

“It will come soon, we just have to be patient,” I told him. He nodded.

“I don't care if you can hear or speak, I like you anyway,” he said. Then someone behind him caught his attention.
“Come on Bertie, we have to continue,” Quinn said, and played something on his guitar. I smiled at them. Bert took his original place behind the microphone and nodded. They all started playing, and as Bert opened his mouth to sing, I could finally hear him. I heard every word, and every sound.

 

“Cut yourself in conversation

Cut the line to make me feel alive
'Cause you know I'm not alive

 

And leave me with your complications

Take your life, you feel like taking mine

Meeting god we stand in line, not alone

 

Nowhere to go, I'm not leaving

Not going, I'm not kissing you goodbye
On my own, I'm nothing

Just bleeding, I'm not kissing you goodbye

 

Trust to take the righ to leave me

Waiting under dark clouds for the rain

Praying lightning strikes a change

As history gets lost and

As I took that final breath I felt alive

Meeting god, to stand in line, all alone

 

Nowhere to go, I'm not leaving

Not going, I'm not kissing you goodbye

On my own, I'm noting

Just bleeding, I'm not kissing you goodbye”

 

I stood up and smiled, as the song was finished.

“That was amazing,” I said. It was the first sentence I had uttered since I was fourteen and even though it hurt in my throat, it was the most amazing feeling I had ever felt.